Psalm 13:2-6, ,

Daily Meditation:  Psalm 13:2-6

Psalm 19:2-6

2 How long, O Lord, will you forget me

and hide your face from me?

3 How long must I suffer pain in my soul

and grief in my heart all the day long?

How long shall my enemy triumph over me?

4 Look upon me and answer, O Lord my God!  Give light to my eyes,

lest I sleep the sleep of death;

5 lest my enemy say,

“I have routed him,”

lest my foes rejoice of my fall.

6 But I put my trust in your unfailing love,

my heart will rejoice on seeing your salvation.

I will sing to the Lord,

for he has been good to me!

Beloved, I live in time, You live in eternity. A thousand years are but a moment to You - for me though a moment can sometimes seem to last forever.

There are so many graces I've been praying for and I have been doing so for years.  Grace to overcome faults that seem so deeply ingrained in me I have found it difficult to root them out.  I know I need Your help and so I come and plead with You each day.  It seems that in certain areas I have made little or no progress at all despite my prayers pleading for You assistance.

How much longer Beloved before You answer me?  How much longer must I struggle?  If you do not help me, I will stumble once too often and I could be lost to You and the enemy will triumph over me.

You are my light and my strength.  I love You.  I need You.  I hunger and thirst for You and sometimes it seems You are beyond my reach.  I seem to make so little progress in my walk with You.  Of course I do know that You are always with me.  Your Holy Spirit lives in me.  I am the apple of the Father's eye and yet sometimes I feel abandoned and alone in my struggle against my weaknesses.  BUT I DO KNOW I AM NOT ALONE AND YOU DO HELP ME.

Beloved, my happiest times are when I receive You  in the Holy Eucharist and for a brief moment we are one.  There I experience Your Presence.  I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that my heart holds You - holds Infinity.

I know You will help me.  I know that life is a journey with many struggles, stumbling, failing and falling as well as rising up, starting over, small triumphs and victories.  I must go on praying and pleading for the grace I need, aware that I need to lean on You all the time.  You will always be present to support me.

A time will come Beloved when I will exult and rejoice for You are exceedingly good to me always and with Your help, surely but certainly I will make progress in my walk with You.

M--- mine, Your walk with me will be one of daily struggle and challenge simple because You have a life time of bad habits to overcome.  It is a daily moment to moment conquering of self.  Often the struggle you put up is half hearted, weak and quite non existent sometimes.  You have to be honest with yourself.  How serious are You to walk closely with Me? Are you prepared to do whatever it takes to imitate Me?  The greater the self sacrifice, the greater the progress.  Your progress is proportionate to the sacrifices you make.

How true my Lord.  Help me to conquer self more readily than I have done so far.  Teach me to ask for the help of Your Holy Spirit and to rely on His guidance always. Amen.